Confessions of a Nonprofit Leader: The True Cost of Generosity

Kristen Caloca • September 3, 2025

This post was contributed by an anonymous nonprofit executive based in Southern California.

I've worked in the nonprofit sector for many years now, serving on both executive teams and as a senior advisor to the CEO. Specifically, I've worked with organizations focused on supporting individuals experiencing homelessness, one of our region's most vexing problems to address.  Our corner of the nonprofit sector, in particular, is subject to the antiquated view of “charity,” and we are often the recipient of well-intentioned acts of generosity that may even look good on the surface but come with hidden costs that create greater burdens for our nonprofit.

To be clear, our nonprofit relies on and is immensely grateful for the kindness of our community. Yet, behind the scenes, teams sometimes spend as much time managing the impact of donations as they do using them. I've lost count of the times a van full of used clothing has arrived unannounced, often with unwearable items, or a group has shown up ready to volunteer in ways we weren't prepared to manage. Each of these moments requires staff time, storage, sorting, and, sometimes, the necessary choice to redirect the donor.

Generosity is beautiful, but when it isn't paired with intention, it can create extra work, drain resources, or even compromise the dignity of the people we serve. If you genuinely want to support nonprofits, here's how you can help in ways that make the greatest difference, particularly during these turbulent times.

Come with ideas but be flexible.
Have a sense of how you'd like to contribute, whether financially, in-kind, or through volunteering, but be open to our guidance. We know where the needs are most urgent. Even better, scan the nonprofit’s website to review their current strategic priorities or areas of need and think about how your idea can connect to those areas we've identified.

Check before giving large in-kind donations.
Storage is often the biggest constraint. Call the organization first. And please, as a rule of thumb: if you wouldn't want your loved one to sit on it, wear it, or eat it, don't donate it. Give the very best you have to offer because that's what our clients deserve.

Prioritize unrestricted, recurring financial gifts.
Even small monthly donations of $20 help organizations address urgent needs, keep the lights on, and sustain long-term impact. Flexible contributions are the foundation of our work. They also enable us to communicate regularly with you about our needs and the effects of your contributions, which is important for building relationships with supporters.

Offer professional expertise.
Pro bono legal help is invaluable right now, especially as the nonprofit sector navigates new regulations, contracts, and compliance requirements. If your skills are in another area, ask how it might help; sometimes your knowledge can have more impact than you realize. You can also ask to join an advisory committee, if the organization has one, or offer to start one and recruit from your network to address key nonprofit needs: finance, strategic planning, branding and communications, fundraising, and programs/partnerships.

Use your platform to amplify our work.
Host a workplace "lunch and learn," invite friends to a backyard gathering for a PowerPoint party about our nonprofit and cause, or create content about our work and impact to share on your social media channels. Take the lead on logistics to avoid placing the burden on our already stretched staff.

Respect time and relationships.
Avoid last-minute requests for tours or introductions. These can disrupt teams and compromise the privacy of those we serve. If you want to engage more deeply, work with us to follow ethical storytelling and scheduling practices. Better yet, offer to volunteer!

Be mindful of capacity.
Every new idea, no matter how exciting, requires people, time, and resources. Before proposing something to a nonprofit you support, ask yourself: Who will do the work? How will it be sustained? If you're committed, be prepared to invest whatever is needed to make it successful.

Advocate and mobilize.
Use your voice. Contact elected officials, share our advocacy priorities, and encourage your networks to get involved. Policy change can make a bigger impact than any single donation, and right now, this is one of our greatest needs.

I will always be grateful for our community's generosity that supports us daily. But I want people to understand that true generosity isn't just about giving; it's about giving thoughtfully, responsibly, and in partnership with us. Offer your best and don’t be afraid to ask a simple question: “How can I help?” to support the causes you are passionate about more effectively.

When generosity aligns with thoughtful intention and focuses on the individuals you want to support, we can achieve real, lasting change together.

  Have a confession to share? Email us your idea: KMCSocialImpactStrat@gmail.com.

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